The Cliffs of Insanity

If I did enough of these, it was bound to happen.

Sith ingenuity prevails over stinky Jedi copyright stinginess every single time. Enjoy!

Kicking Giant Arse from Tinhuviel on Vimeo.

It's one of those strange sort of occurrences that makes a thing undeniable. This song has been on my iPod(s) for like a thousand years, but it rarely comes up. When I started hunting for Archibald videos, and was mostly sorely disappointed, I found a video that used the song and was "Well, how about that? Coldplay and Cunningham, what an odd combination." And I thought nothing of it anymore. That's been a couple or three months ago. Again, I forgot about the song.

Then today, about an hour ago while I was walking and listening to Froderick, the song came up again, and I started listening to the song, and BOOM, it was transferred from being "just Coldplay" or "just a song used in an Archibald video," because really Flint is absolutely nothing like Archie, who would kill everyone within a twenty-mile radius if given half a chance (much like Cadmus), it became a "shiiiite, that's upbeat with a que sera sera sort of vibe, but still talking about a 'then and now' situation...Flint!" And the title itself pretty much describes Flint's philosophy ~ Viva La Vida, live the life.

Now, there's no doubt I have to keep the little bugger around, denying Cadmus his midnight snack...and honestly, in the scheme of things, Flint wouldn't be much more to Cadmus than a snack.

So here are the lyrics, the Flintian bits in bold. Following that is the proper Coldplay video, then the Archie video that I saw a while back, just for the hell of it.

I used to rule the world
Seas would rise when I gave the word
Now in the morning I sleep alone
Sweep the streets I used to own

I used to roll the dice
Feel the fear in my enemy's eyes
Listen as the crowd would sing
"Now the old king is dead! Long live the king!"

One minute I held the key
Next the walls were closed on me
And I discovered that my castles stand
Upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand

I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror, my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field

For some reason I can't explain
Once you go there was never
Never an honest word
And that was when I ruled the world

It was the wicked and wild wind
Blew down the doors to let me in
Shattered windows and the sound of drums
People couldn't believe what I'd become

Revolutionaries wait
For my head on a silver plate
Just a puppet on a lonely string
Oh who would ever want to be king?

I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror, my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field

For some reason I can't explain
I know Saint Peter won't call my name
Never an honest word
But that was when I ruled the world

I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror, my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field

For some reason I can't explain
I know Saint Peter won't call my name
Never an honest word
But that was when I ruled the world

Great Mother, I’m going to have to start smoking if I keep on this road of doom. Here are some delicious quotes from Archibald Cunningham (Cunning Man, perhaps?). They are some of my very favourites of any character known to me. Woo Nelly!

“What did you do with that bag of guts Killearn? Vex me not, McGregor, or I shall have you dragged a while. And I am a man of my word.”

“Love is a dung hill, Betty, and I am but a cock that climbs upon it to crow.”

This one is just too cool, especially how he delivers it.  ::dies::
Duke of Argyll:  So, Mr. Cunningham, what are these principle sins that distress your mother? Dice? Drink? Or are you a buggerer of boys?
Archibald: It is years, Your Grace, since I buggered a boy... And in my own defense, I must add, I thought him a girl at the moment of entry.

AAAHHHHH!! It’s Lord Sidious and Maul!!
Montrose: I have had a message from His Grace the Duke of Argyll. It seems our MacGregor is holed up with him. He offers us a match: you and the Highlander.
Archibald: [rasping whisper] Bring him on.
Montrose: You speak, Archibald! One must never underestimate the healing power of hatred.

I’m sure I will find more, and you should be certain I’ll impose them all on you. BWWAAAH!


But you know, beauty can be terrifying...and there is nothing straightforward about pleasure...

So I keep watching Rob Roy. This time, I had the good sense to actually tape it (I need to break down and buy the DVD when I can) so I can get past all the rubbishy hoo-ha and get right down to business with Tim Roth's undeniably sexy Archibald Cunningham. And I think I have realised something that I had probably known subconsciously, but was never able to put it into exact words.

I am hopelessly attracted to Delicate Death. That is what it is. A dude on Facebook called most of the representations of my animus "girly boys," and perhaps he's right. It's just irresistibly sexy as hell to watch a fine-boned man reveal that he is, in actuality, a killing machine.

Now I'm not a proponent of violence, despite my Sithly attitude. Just because I want everyone dead doesn't mean I will go out and start killing people. But...to have a man you'd least expect to be capable, to do the killing for you? I'm at such a man's mercy. I want to have a taxidermist stuff him so I can set him on my mantle and gaze upon him the endless hours of the night.

So I first saw Rob Roy in 1996 and was immediately taken with Tim Roth. I had never seen him before. He was the reason I backtracked and watched Pulp Fiction. But I've always preferred him as Archibald. He has that certain glint in his eye, even when not in that character, and I immediately pick up on it. For example, my user pic here. Great godalmighty, what a beautiful specimen of Delicate Death.

I believe that, to a certain degree, we all wear masks that reflect our inner selves. I guess that's why I've always liked masks and why I gave Cadmus the Landon Dunlevy mask, baptised in the Blood of a Vampire martyr. Tim Roth could not have played the role of Archibald Cunningham as well as he did without have a seedling somewhere in his soul that allowed him to transform. Even as Ted the Bellhop, you can see it peeking through.

I haven't seen Lie to Me because I always missed it, but it's in my netflix and hulu queues. So I have every intention, and this was before the wild spate of Rob Roy screenings on ION this entire month. I've been overloaded on Archibald, vicious little bastard that he is, and I would molest him if given just a tiddly bit of a chance. It says a lot that I would choose him over any Scotsman. That is fundamentally contrary to my nature, being a well-known Scots ho.

What is so hilarious is that, when I did an image search for Archibald Cunningham, the following people popped up as results:

• Darth Maul, small and graceful and lethal


• Pinhead, another small man, but he can tear your soul apart, and do it in bondage gear. Soooo sexy


• Francis Dollarhyde as seen in freakin' Manhunter. Totally not my cuppa, but the movie holds a particular fascination. Anyone who knows me, knows why.


• Hannibal Lecter. I kid you not. And he's wearing his mask.


• Heath Ledger's Joker, a clown on the outside, masking a deadly force that nearly destroyed an entire city. I wrote so much fanfiction for this character, it's ridiculous. And all of it was, for lack of a better word to allow me to remain remotely civilised, naughty (?)


• Jet Li, small, deadly, and capable of creating poetry with his Wu Shu forms


• Agent Smith, the bane to all humanity, and showing off his mad Kung Fu skillz in a business suit!


• Darth Vader. He was my very first action figure and ohhhh, I loved that wee toy.


• Darkness from Legend. "Mother Night, wrap your daaark aaaarms around me." Need I say more?

And that was in a search for Archibald screencaps. There is obviously a deep connection into which I have tuned. All of these are death dealers with varying levels of delicacy. Or they are involved with masked death dealers of the utmost delicacy.

I find it all so delicious. And relevant. And kind of freaky. But absolutely, undeniably, irresistibly enthralling. They could kill for me in all their grace and then I would shag them silly (except for Francis...no). I admit it. I am attracted to girly-boys, but just as long as they are masking their true murderous nature.

Delicate Death. The mask and the man behind it...the ruse and the truth. It boggles the mind.

On that note, I have some pictures of Archibald and Tim Roth I'll be posting here very soon. I'll post one now because it's probably the most primal and sexual to me, besides my user icon.

My head went asplodey at that one. I'm sure this is just a role or a modeling pic or some such, but I DO know with certainty of two of my animus representations who admit to experimenting in their youth. And it is arousing. Yes, you men out there. You find two women together hot? A lot of we women feel the same about you. Just go to any fanfic site dominated by the fairer sex, and you will find such debauchery in the slash department, you will run the other way.

And let us not get into the devices of Cadmus Pariah, another small and perhaps the most delicate dealer in death, who does not care who he attracts or what he must do to get the blood he needs and exact some of the suffering he desires. His Beautiful Pets are both boys and girls, locked away in iron collars, wasting away as they are periodically milked for their blood. Yeah, everyone should run the other way, not just the men. Hell, I want to run the other way in regard to this one, but there's no escaping your own horrid little character/child.

As Ace Ventura would say ~ "AAAAALRIGHTY THEN!"

**EDIT**
I just found this Tim Roth quote and had to come back to say "I toldja so," if only to myself.

"I've never really played a goody in the traditional sense. Anyway, I don't think that I look the part of a heroic character, especially not in Hollywood, so they never really come up. On a childish level, villains are just more fun."

Oh dear god.