The Cliffs of Insanity

There are a lot of things I'd like to talk about that I just...can't talk about. It's irksome, but there you go. If a Sith's life weren't irksome, she'd no reason to live. Sith are supposed to be irked. That's what being Sith is all about: honing your rage to a nice fine point, then rising up and striking down your master. Of course, I have no master, so I'd just go on a killing spree because, as we say in the South, people "need killin'." It's just a fact of life and that defense has been used in Southern courts in the past: "So-and-so needed killin'." Understandable. Not-guilty, next!

I've reached a bit of a snag in my Sith duties here of late. I try to maintain an underlying low-grade anger, just to hold on to for any ungodly situation that may need my full-blown ire. I've encountered someone twice, someone I was a tad irked at, at the time. Each time, I went away all sunshine and flowers, and pissed off that I was no longer pissed off. How conflicted can one person get? The soul in question has some serious Anti-Tin scary fairy dust on hand and I am to steal the crap for to bury it. Today, however, is not one of those days where I want to sing-a about the moon-a and the june-a and the spring-a. Today is one of those days I want to rant and be writerly and moody, and.....do the things that I want to do! Not what my brain wants me to do. So I'm back to being filled with ire and nursing my low-grade anger. Let's hope the Anti-Tin doesn't show up with bunnies....

Have a video for your trouble. I would have put it on You Tube, but the bastards said it was too long. And here I thought I was only long winded in words..

The Writer's Rant from Tinhuviel on Vimeo.

**EDIT** Perhaps I would have been taken more seriously if I'd worn a different tee shirt that day. Maybe my 'I Haz a Bukket' or 'Can't Stop Writing or My Music Will Eat Me.' Pre-plan, boys and girls... Lesson here.

I got a tad side-tracked and never posted the final date story here. Yeah yeah, I know, 'The Final Date' was supposed to be my final date, but things happen. This is the last one but, chronologically, happens after 'The Goth Chick's Date (aka the One that Got away)' because J has his iPod (from the dentist), but he doesn't have his hedgehog yet. I never formally introduced Sidney. Since this was my only chance to do so, I did. Sidney was originally conceived as a one-shot character, based on Sidney Poitier. Mr. Poitier starred in one of my patriarchal grandmother's favourite movies, Lilies of the Field. The movie was about a fraggle of nuns and how Poitier's handyman character helped them out one Summer. When I wrote 'The Nun's Date,' the first thing I thought about was this movie; thus, the existence of Sidney. There'd been so many people who were fond of him, though, I kept him around much longer than the Joker ever would have.

Uhm...disclaimers. If you're easily squicked, don't read this mmkay? I don't know what else to say. Oh, it's probably full of typos and whatnot because I was in a mad rush to finish this Monday night and had no time to proofread. And I still haven't because I've been too busy with other stuff. If you notice anything hideous, give me a shout so I can change my file. I doubt I'll change it here because HTML makes it very difficult to find the offense in question.

One thing's for certain, writers' withdrawal sucks. This is second day and, already, I'm missing this character. If I can make to Saturday, though, I should be okay and can turn my attention back to The Blood Crown. I've no doubt I'll make it without giving in this time, though. Fellow J-fic aficionados: consider Tin officially retired with this story. Whee!

Props go out to Kanike, who helped with the word association therapy and with naming the psychologist. Oh, and many thanks for the therapy in general. It’s a difficult job being a psychopath…..on paper that is. Ha.

Also many props go out to Gunslingaaahhh, Masquedbunny, MsManagr, RevClaudia, Opal Lynn, and Mldrfan, who offered support and suggestions regarding the Heath references and phobias. Special props go to Guns, who offers up all manner of Heath education I did not possess prior to this operation. I swear, J would never have a date if it weren’t for his harem of willing supporters.

( cut for fake courtesy )

did I ever think a story I'd be writing would have Christina Aguilera as a primary inspiration.



It'll be finished today.

Since I am now missing my fanfic deadline with a vengeance, I figured I'd enjoy myself whilst doing so. chris_walsh, a relatively new pal here on LJ, sent me five words that make him think of me so I can give him my take on them. After you read my yammering about the five words he gave me, you can comment on this post and I'll give you five words so you can do the same. Ain't that more fun than a snorkel of weasels? I think so!

So here we go...

1. 
   
2. therealljidol: I was a competitor in the first season of LJ Idol when there were like 3 people fighting like emaciated canines over the chicken bone that was the title of LJ Idol Winner. Being the vicious dog that I am, I won the competition. Since then, LJ Idol has become somewhat of a phenomenon not only on Live Journal, but also on the Internet, being one of those sublime occurrences that allows people to stretch out their writer's muscles while making new friends. It's not just a competition for writers; it's a gathering place for creative people who who want to be a part of something that helps define the word groovy. Even though I know there's no way I could ever win, not with all the talented individuals vying for the title now, I'd still love to be a part of the competition, just for the heck of it. Actually, I do participate on the peripheries of the competition. If there's a prompt I feel compelled to write on, then I will. I get to enjoy the writerly aspects of the competition without stressing over the competitive aspects. Fae Publishing is in the process of producing a book showcasing the best of what LJ Idol has had to offer over the years. I'm happy to say I'm a part of this undertaking. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I'd be able to say "Yo! I'm a published writer!" because of something clauderainsrm, of all people, would cook up out of that demented can of potted meat he calls a brain. I guess that means I have to be all grateful to him, for at least the next ten minutes. So, Gary? Thaaaaanks...
3. 
   
4. Spork: Ah the Mighty Spork! I like to say the word 'spork' almost as much as I do 'weasel.' And the mere thought of a weasel with a spork sends my imagination into never-before-explored regions of full-on hilarity. It's like something Eliza Doolittle would be forced to repeat constantly before going on that cotillion date with Professor Higgins: "A snorkel of weasels must spackle with the spork when it rains in Spain all the zippity-doo-dah-day!"
   
   If I ever opened a restaurant, I would name it the Golden Spork and I'd have a giant spork out front like the monolith from 2001: A Space Odyssey. It would greatly amuse me to see patrons of my establishment react to my giant spork in much the same way the apes did the monolith in the Kubrick film.
   
   Then, of course, there's the entire re-writing of the Spoon scene in The Matrix to better fit the whole Spork Motif. Yes, there's a Spork Motif. At least, there is now. Here on the Cliffs, we're all about sporks and weasels. Don't ever forget it.
5. 
   
6. Buttah: I have an aunt on the Mother Unit's side of the family who is the epitome of Mike Myers' Coffee Talk lady. She even gets verklempt. That's really apropos of nothing except for the fact that the Coffee Talk lady declares things she admires to the utmost to be like buttah. I tend to do the same. If I mention that something is like buttah, I really like it. If I state that something "is like a big stick o'buttah," that pretty much means it's so awesome, it will clog your arteries with nothing but pure win. For instance, the Gorillaz are like buttah, but Shriekback is like a big stick o'buttah. Law & Order is like buttah, but Law & Order: SVU is like a big stick o'buttah. Han Solo is like buttah, but Darth Maul is like a big sexy stick o'buttah! Dig?
7. 
   
8. Fanfic: That thing I'm not writing at the moment and it may be too late to even finish it now. We'll see. I actually just learnt that people write fanfiction about actual living, breathing people. Like this one chick on Twitter writes Green Day fanfiction. I don't think I could ever do such a thing. My fanfiction has to be about fictional characters only, thankyouverymuch. And, believe it or not, I've not written that much fanfic. My first sojourn in that realm of fandom was writing Darth Maul fanfic back in 1999 and 2000 for the Darth Maul Estrogen Brigade. My second fanfic outing has been Joker fanfiction, mainly the Date Series, written for Rancid Rainbow. The majority of my fanfic has been erotic, but that's not to say all of it is erotic. A couple of my Maul fics were comedies and some of my J-fic has ranged from Jungian/occultish to dreadfully misanthropic. I even collaborated on a fiction, which I usually never do. It resulted in the first of a two part 'interview' written by dandyxrandy and myself. Writing fanfiction helped break a horrible block with which I'd been struggling back in 1999, so I figure I will always return to the medium as inspiration strikes because it's it's too fun not to dabble with and it really helps work on the writer bone.
9. 
   
10. Izzard: One of my greatest heroes and quite possibly the most quotable human being on the planet. When green_goblin7t introduced me to Eddie Izzard, I was instantly in awe and in love. The man is a brain in a frock. Simple as that. Really, words just fail me when it comes to Eddie Izzard. He's....my hero!
11. 
    

Disclaimers from part 1 apply to this second installment, probably more so. Read at your own risk.

Look at what rancid_rainbow did to me. I don't know what to say.

I'm writing what will be the darkest Date Night in the history of the series. Here's what I have so far. It all looks pretty innocent but, trust me, how I'm gonna end it? The Nun's Date is gonna look like a Vaudeville joke.

He sat in the lofty comfort of his second floor room, gazing out across the endless ordered lawns that surrounded what his neighbours thought was an abandoned millhouse. The Joker’s place was the eyesore of this neighbourhood and the people who lived there inclined to keep their eyes averted from the place, hoping that it would someday go away. Much like the way people reacted to him when they saw him, either with or without the war paint.

But the Joker didn’t care. As long as they stayed away and showed an active disinterest in his little corner of the world, he was pleased as punch. Judy even. He’d docked his iPod, the very one he’d taken as a souvenir from the lovely dentist who had no vision beyond her little organised universe. It was people liked that the Joker liked to make squirm before he killed them. I wanted to see the realisation of Chaos in their eyes before he released them into Oblivion, a flesh gift to the gods of Existentialism.

He had an itch and not one you could scratch with one of those curly pieces-of-shit wood you get at tourist traps. It was further fueled by the music his iPod had decided to play on shuffle. Lots of Massive Attack. Dr. Romello had had a thing for this band, apparently, and the Joker could see why. The steady, driving beats, the wall of bass, the undeniable sonic manifestation of seduction could not be denied. And that was what J wanted now, seduction. He wanted to seduce and be seduced. He wanted to sink into the inevitability of flesh where madness and scars were nightmares in another world.

But he didn’t really want to go out this evening either. He’d planned on lying low since the uproar over the nun. The Joker could depend on Sidney to bring him someone, he guessed, but that did seem terribly antiseptic. The Joker chuffed heavily and rubbed his paintless face, gazing out to the far Gotham horizon. The sun was beginning to sink. Decisions, decisions…

About that time, a movement below caught the Joker’s eye. He looked down to see a woman of about 35 staring up at him. Just standing there in his yard, peering up at him like she’d never seen another person before in her entire life. Not taking his eyes from her, J pressed a small comm button on the desk next to the window.

“Yeah, boss?” Sidney said.

“There’s a woman in our front yard staring up at me. Go..get..her.”

Sidney didn’t even respond back because he was that good. Why waste time saying “all right” when it had better damned well be all right? He watched as Sidney emerged from the house, his bald brown pate reflecting the evening sun. The Joker giggled at Sidney, who didn’t say a word to the woman, just grabbed her by the arm and hustled her in doors. Sidney didn’t play around. He liked Sidney. Turning his head away from the window, the Joker inclined the left side of his head to his bedroom door, listening.

---

There will be more. Oh yes, there will be more.

The creation of the message board was a little more in depth than I at first thought it would be. It took up the majority of my day, speaking with Phade on how it should be constructed, what should go on it and how, and what forums should have full moderation.

As it stands, Blog Boy's actor forum is fully moderated. Nothing gets past the admins on that forum. Gotta protect tha little bro. Everything else is pretty much a free-for-all like his You Tube channel, just a little more organised. Phade has to be given serious props in manifesting what I was writing out to her. We make a great team. We're the Abbott and Costello of The Joker Blogs. Who's on first?

I got no writing done today; however, I did beta for paisleydaze, who is writing one of the most original and beautifully-written J-fics I've ever read. I can't hardly wait for the next installment.

And that's pretty much it. If you want to see the pretty new message board, you can clickie here: The Joker Blogs Forum. 'Cos it's live! It took us all day, but we did it. Sit a spell. Say howdy. Poke around and see what you like. Tell 'em Tin sentcha. I'm Tin over there too. I'm Tin every-damn-where. All that said, I'm going to bed...with Vin Diesel. It's Pitch Black time!

I hate it when LJ truncates my posts. I should be allowed to submit any size a post I wish! I've got a permanent account, dammit! That should count for something! Okay, enough ranting. On to part two.

( we left the clowns kissing... )

I swore I wouldn't do it. I swore up one wall and down the other. But I'm doing it. It's all rancid_rainbow's fault. I'm doing my level best to separate the various Joker's in my head. The Date Joker was always my fun Joker, so he was a little susceptible to the fun-lovingness aspect of Blog Boy, which didn't work on the J-erotica front. So I had to retire the Date Night series. But here I am writing another. I think I've successfully found a way to pull out my old J-ness without bringing the "little brother" aspect into it, so here's to more dreadfully delightful Date Nights, or at least one more.

Here's what I have so far. Inspired in part by all my J-fandom homies, but dedicated particularly to rancid_rainbow. It's been hella fun so far, as has almost all the Date Nights, "The Nun's Date" notwithstanding. Thanks to baxaphobia for lodging "My Sharona" in my head, thus the name of the clown ~ Ramona. You see where this is going and what J will be singing at one point in the tale. And thanks to lindsaybits, who sent me the song, which I'd lost when my last computer died. Love you peoples in a dedicated Sithly way!

( a sneak peek )