Plaguing Me

[tinhuvielartanis]

I've just finished a Cadmus story, but he is demanding more words. This is one of the reasons why I was awake all night. His vicious demands are incessant, and I wish there were some way I could silence his diabolical purr. Sometimes I get weary of the dreadful imagery that haunts my head. The thing I find most distressing is that this is a large aspect of who I am. I have no idea how I ended up with a morbid fascination with insane violence and unimaginable abuse. I always return to the visions of vivisection. Cadmus basks in what he perceives to be incredibly beautiful, to rip apart a Vampire and allow him to heal, just so he can do it again. What kind of deviance do I harbour, that I can immerse in such darkness? Sometimes I feel as if I'm going mad.