Wherein Tin Has a Near-Fatal Heart Attack

Post-Aunt Tudi Financial Update

I'd say I'm happy about this, but I'd really rather just have Aunt Tudi back, if only for an hour...to apologise for everything I did that I shouldn't have done and everything I didn't do that I should have. I'd gladly live in complete abject poverty, go hungry, lose my home, my animal friends, EVERYTHING...just for an hour...ten minutes. A minute...

But that's not an option...

Since the end of August -

• Light bill has fallen from almost $200 a month to an average of $55


• Phone/Internet bill has risen from around $90 to just at $200, only because I've subscribed to every movie channel known to the modern world. It's how I get through some days.


• Water bill has fallen from around $25 a month to exactly $12 a month, the minimum


• Heating has cost me a total of $234 for the entire season, basically because I've shut off a room to the house, I'm going through The Change and no longer am cold-natured, and SC hasn't had a Winter.


• Groceries have fallen from around $500 a month to about $150, depending on if I need staples as well, like cleaners, toilet paper, blah blah blah

Regarding groceries: Over the past six months, I have basically become vegetarian, eating meat only when I have dinner with Uncle Michael and Aunt Janice, and usually getting sick when I eat too much of it. I have started buying more local and organic food, which accounts for my bill being higher than I would have been if I'd continued to eat like I did when Aunt Tudi was with me. I still don't eat very much at all, and am actually about to dip under 200 pounds for the first time since 1983. Potatoes have become more than my best friend, earning family status as of February. I buy recycled when and where I can. I've been to Wal-Mart twice since August. One time to buy a phone card because the website wouldn't let me add minutes and the other right before my surgery, because I needed some pants that didn't squeeze my leg at all, and couldn't find them at Target.

I try to treat myself to at least one non-essential goodie (usually a DVD) after I've met all my obligations each month. I haven't done this yet in March because I haven't paid all my bills yet. I need to pay them this week, or I'm going to be late, and I have no excuse for that except I'm still recovering from surgery and I seem to have some sort of block about getting things done, worse this month than it has been for the past couple.

I keep relapsing as far as my depression goes. When it's bad, or gets worse, I stop doing housework, stop eating, stop everything. I just sit and ache. But I've tried hard to avoid this. My Tim Roth obsession has actually helped me immensely. He gets my mind off everything else. He's triggered my writing. I wonder what he'd think if he knew this. He'd probably conclude that I'm a total nutter, which would be correct.

The Ask-a-Baz

This was the first interview with Barry Andrews in quite some time and, to my knowledge, the very first fan-driven interview. Driven by questions asked by members of the original Shriekback mailing list, the interview was sent to B, who returned the file to me with his answers included. It turned out to be a lot easier and less stressful than the chat we arranged right about the same time. Until just recently, I thought I had lost this portion of the old Digital Conspiracy site. Now that I've found it, I'm putting it here on the Cliffs, so it will once again have a web presence. (Some of the text is white to differentiate the questions from the answers. If you have trouble seeing this, just highlight the invisible areas and everything should show up)

( The Interview )