Travel Journal 2

SUNDAY 14 MAY, 2006
12:40 PM Greenwich Mean Time
Listening to: a rugby game on TV

Welcome to the realm of surreality. I haven't written in a few days because I haven't been certain what to write when I could write, and I didn't have the opportunity to write when I knew what I had to say.

That said, the account of this trip may be disjointed and come in repeated "tells" in order to relay everything that's happened. There will probably be the esoteric, "perceptive" accounts of Stonehenge, Avebury, and the Uffington White Horse. Then there will be the mundane accounts, smattered with the comedy that seems to follow me around like a lost dog.

I don't have much juice in the computer and I'm writing this in Word at the moment, so this entry may be seriously abrupt in order to squeeze in as much of the information as possible. It may actually be an outline of issues, vignettes, and occurrences I want to remember to write about later when I have more of a chance.

At the moment, we're at Steve's house and have been since Friday evening. Steve is falkenna's ex and he has a lovely nine-year-old daughter of whom I'm quite fond, and that's saying a lot since I'm not all that crazy about kids. We'll be leaving here today to go to Bath for a while, then back to Brighton. I'm hoping that the trip will be without much incident, as Aunt Tudi's back is near about broken and the traveling by car is the main reason for it now.

So….not much of this will make sense for now, but it will later as I am able to commit it all to paper.

FRIDAY:
" Stonehenge
" Chepstow (or Cas Gwent), Wales
" Aunt Tudi's encounters with interested Welshmen
" Steve, Eleri, curry, and Bill Bailey
" The dream about Steve, the comic book shop, the mafia, Felice, falkenna, and Aunt Tudi

SATURDAY
" Avebury
" The Uffington White Horse, the fall, and the making of the wish
" Dragon Hill
" The White Hart Pub
" Alpaca Liptic discussion and my new second in command.
" Drink, comedy, and song

Like I said, today is for Bath and back to Brighton, probably to vegetate, especially for Aunt Tudi.

SUNDAY 14 MAY, 2006
1:23 PM Greenwich Mean Time
Listening to: a rugby game on TV

I do need to write about the dream I had about Barry Andrews and falkenna. It was deeply disturbing on many levels and, to be honest, I'm not really certain I'm comfortable with relaying it at all. Of course, since I write about everything, or at least try to, I'll write it all down once I've processed the entire dream and know how to word it appropriately. Still though……

There was the sexual nature about the dream that always distresses me on levels I can't even describe when it comes to B, because I don't see him from a sexual perspective and I never want to. falkenna says that will all change on Tuesday, but I don't think so. Our relationship is more of the professional/chummy kind in the Ninth Dimension of the of the Twelfth Sith Hell, and I want to keep it that way, thankyouverrahmuch.

I'm in an extremely weird space, and it's because of where I am, what I've seen, and how I've perceived it.

MONDAY 15 MAY, 2006
10:55 AM Greenwich Mean Time
Listening to: "Angel" on SKYTwo

falkenna is a bit down this morning for a couple of reasons, of which I won't get into here 'cos its not my place. Barely awake, I stumbled downstairs to use the bathroom and get some coffee. Aunt Tudi is still asleep. Now, I'm gonna try to make some sense of everything. Personally, I don't think I'll be successful.

Before I go much further, let me make note that, last night, I dreamt of King Mob and the strangeness of being a new member of the Invisible College. Personally, I think I'm pretty much doomed now, and I blame falkenna.

Okay, now for some backtracking…..

STONEHENGE
To see is rise up on the horizon as we zipped down the A303 was simply mind-boggling. The barrows resting around the area gave off an impression of perpetual whispering, telling of times that we modern folk have gotten all wrong, assuming we know what we fancy we know about the area and what happened in the ancient days of the land.

The circle of stones rests there, emanating a sense of permanence compared to the briefness of our little viral lives. Even though the site is in disarray, the circle incomplete thanks to the ravages of time and the ignorance, fear, and general desperation of future human settlements, the ghosts of the temple (if that is what it was) draw the outlines of the missing or fallen stones where they're supposed to be. You can just see them on the peripheries of your sight ("reality is peripheral").

The closer we got to Stonehenge, walking the designated path around it, the more muted the world "outside" became. It's hard to describe. It's like the area around and including the stone circle is set within or creates its own particular dimension. Once you're in the parameter of that space, the sounds of the natural world, the car noise, and the basic human racket becomes very faint. Sound within the space doesn't carry. I felt like my words, once they left my mouth, fell like chunks of metal right at my feet. The energies that are naturally there and that were probably invoked and manipulated by the people who knew how to work within the henge are absolutely still there and still quite powerful.

It should be of note that the heel stone looks like a bird of prey. falkenna noted that it looked like a hawk or eagle to her. To me, it was an owl. I think the presence of the animals in the stones was more than appropriate. The natural world goes on around Stonehenge. Magpies, crows, and grackles nest in the stones and banter back and forth constantly. And sheep roam about freely, keeping the grass low as they live their sheep lives.

The Father Unit had mentioned how I'd be unimpressed with Stonehenge, how it's not as large as it's portrayed in pictures and on television. Honestly, I never thought about the circle's size. Just the fact that it exists is enough for me. But, yeah, it's pretty freakin' large as far as I'm concerned. The Father Unit is obviously quite mad, 'cos he sure as hell isn't so big that Stonehenge would seem small compared to his world view. Crazy, man, cah-razy!

Barry Angst

MONDAY 15 MAY, 2006
10:45 PM Greenwich Mean Time
Listening to: "Medium" on TV

The primary reason I didn't bring all of my jewelry here to England is that, by the time Barry was due to falkenna's house, I'd be dripping with all of my pendants, talismans, roots on strings, nails from Christ's cross, railroad spikes, Voodoo dolls, a hand of glory, a small piece of petrified Redeye Grande, a bit of feces from one of the members of ABBA encased in a small phial of water, and other sundry agents of protection. However, I have several dozen stones from various places in England with which, had I the time, I could build a small rock wall around myself and peep out on occasion like a prairie dog gone knotty in the head. I may still do that, using falkenna's day bed, behind which I shall be hiding. That, in itself, will be a miracle, considering there's only an inch of space between the back of her day bed and the window behind it. But I'll manage. I'll just use the grease from my leftover fish and chips to lube my arse up and I'll easily slide back there, no problems.

All that being said, yes I'm overflowing with Barry angst and am certain with every passing second that my fate has been sealed. I'm hearing ominous incidental music with every step I take. That damned orchestra needs to pack up and go the fuck away, 'cos I'm tired of it.

In all seriousness, I am a bit……nervous. Okay, I'm more than nervous. I'm, as Jeff Goldblum said in Jurassic Park when the T-Rex was on its way to eat the lawyer, "I'm fairly alarmed here." And I know why on a certain level, but not on other levels. Having worked on the skids of the music business, I did have opportunity to meet some celebrities over the years. Once the charm of something like that passes, it's really not that big of deal. The chicks from TLC were all midgets. Lorrie Morgan was a ho who got lucky. And then I saw my ultimate idol and father figure Jeff Lynne from afar, and I wasn't freaked out, just happy to be there and finally be in the presence of one who had so fundamentally changed my life and profoundly influenced me.

He's a human being. On an intellectual level, a level of "what the fuck is wrong with you, you crazy shit?", I know this. But there's something else there. Am I transferring my own otherworldly darkness onto this hapless soul who only wanted to make good music and enjoy the luxury of groupies? Probably. But why did I transfer in the first place? Why him? Why not someone else? Ah, there's the Big Issue. I think I did it because he can handle it, because he's right there with me. There's a kindred-ness there that I recognized immediately when I saw the bald blue guy in a toga. The dread futility is my own, but he triggered its emergence from hundreds….thousands of miles away. What will he trigger only a few feet away, a few inches away?

I've done tarot readings, I've consulted the Oracle of the Goddess, and falkenna allowed me to throw her Gypsy rune stones, which she then interpreted for me. Everything points to a very positive and enlightening experience. Still, I don't believe. I am incapable of expecting a positive experience wherein I will survive with my sanity and without my hair turning Nadine Cross white.

One of two things is going to happen tomorrow. I'm either going to freeze up from fright and shyness, and subsequently sit there like Akasha, a silent stone, immovable and unresponsive. Oooorrrr, I'll be overtaken with nerves and babble like an incoherent autistic yak injected with psychotropic drugs by scientists working for the CIA.

What do you think? Discuss.

[Poll #729518]

I know all I've gotten down is the bit about Stonehenge but, I swear to the Mighties, I can't write about what's already happened until I get this meeting with Barry Andrews behind me. I can't wrap my mind around anything else. I have very little mind left. I never had that much to begin with.

C-3PO said it best: "We're doomed."

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PS My phone doesn't work here, so I've been screwed. Due to changes in our schedule, silent_druid, Wednesday has become our London day. I'm sooooo sorry..... :(