tinhuvielartanis | Groove is in the heart.... (Reply)

Well, I can't resist. Here's what I have so far of my second of the Joker "Date Night" series. Oh, lawd hep me, I'm doomed!

“Groove is in the heart,” he sang, sitting on the roof of the tall building, overlooking Gotham. “Groove is in the hea-a-art. DJ Soul is on a roll, I’ve been told he can’t be sold, he’s not vicious or malicious, just de-lovely and delicious….. Hm. Doesn’t sound like my type at all. But, groove is in the heart.”

The Joker stood from his perch and leaned far over the edge of the building, purveying his territory like a cat. “And the heart is restless this de-lovely night. The heart craves…hemp.”

And with that, the Joker tumbled from the top of the building, just falling short of hitting the sidewalk below before he was tugged upward once again by a thin bungee cord attached to his suspenders. He dangled there like a dying yo-yo for a few minutes before slicing through the life line and landing on his feet in front of a tad-passed-middle-aged couple, who were both startled and affronted by the clown blocking their way.

“Oh, do excuse me if I interrupted your classy night out,” the Joker said, his voice a mocking growl.

“I know who you are,” the man said. “Leave us alone or I’ll call the cops. I have a cell phone.”

“What? One of those Jitterbugs with the buttons the size of quarters so you can see the numbers, old man? Why don’t I open up your torsos to see what fancy food you just wasted $500 on?” The Joker almost magically presented the couple with two large daggers. “Fotunately I’m ambidextrous, so I can do you both simultaneousleeee.”

The Joker lunged forward with the knives and the couple both squealed with fright, running off into the dark Gotham night in separate directions. The old man dropped his phone, which the Joker picked up to examine. He snorted. If there was one thing the Joker found unceasingly hilarious, it was how sociopaths like himself knew humanity so well. He flipped the Jitterbug into the air, acting like he was going to catch it on its way back down. Instead, he batted it with the handle of one of the daggers, laughing as it smashed into the wall of the building he’d just dropped down from.

Turning away from the ruined phone, the Joker made his way to a dance club that wasn’t far at all from his home. It was one of those retro places, catering to the hemp wearing, hemp smoking crowd, folks into psychedelic music of yesterday and today, and psychedelic substances of any space-time continuum. It was called The Kaleidescope and the Joker found it to be a deeee-lightful place, despite the human stink. The pot and patchouli covered that up quite nicely most all the time, he’d found.

He walked into the muted lighting and flashy lava-lamp projections and made his way to the bar. The Dukes of Stratosphear blasted over the sound system, a song called “My Love Explodes.” The Joker was old enough to remember and appreciate the alter-egos involved in the Dukes of Stratosphear. Few people knew who they really were, just like the Joker himself. And they dressed very….oddly….just like the Joker himself. The Joker could have been one of Dukes of Stratosphear if time and location had been to his advantage. But who would have been the Joker, then? No, everything always works out for the best. Let those clever British men have their fun and let the Joker have his. The fun he was looking for tonight was a date with a pretty hippie chick. Date Night was nothing if not fraught with variety.

He sidled up to this pretty young thing in a print dirndl and hemp necklace. She had straight dirty blonde hair streaming out from below her burgundy tam and reached to her hips. Her skin was the shade of sea sand at sundown and her eyes were two aquamarine pools of loveliness. Deciding that this young third generation Hippie was just his type, the Joker softened his tone just enough to out-volume the music of the Dukes, and he murmured into her ear, “My love explodes in diamonds and pearls for you, yes you.”

She smiled and turned her head to meet his unflinching gaze. Her smile never faltered. “Love the make-up, dude. And why would your love explode for me? You don’t even know me.”

At first, the Joker was taken aback by the Hippie chick’s apparent non-reaction to his rather unusual face. He was almost surprised to the point of unresponsiveness, but he forced himself beyond that and said, “Well…. Not yet, I don’t, but I’m a good judge of character and my love is all about….explosions, trust-t me, Love-cup.” He licked his red lips slowly, to further communicate his intentions and honesty. “What say let’s ditch this den of depravity and let me show you my etchings?”

“On one condition: that you tell me why a handsome Goth like yourself decided to come to the Kaleidescope.”

Ah, the Joker thought. That would explain it. She thinks I’m some kind of Goth guy or Emo kid. Silly girl. And the Joker chuckled to himself. His own thoughts often amused the Joker, especially if they manifested into reality, like many of his more devilish plans. “Oh, have no fear, Buttermuffin. Before this night is over with, you’ll hear alllll about it.”