tinhuvielartanis: (Barry Exact Science)
This day in Terrifying Astronomy.

Earlier this morning (I've been up all night again), this story popped up on my trending feed.

Ancient Egyptians may have chronicled the flickering of a star known as "the Demon," perhaps the earliest known record of a variable star, astronomers suggest.

And that got me to thinking about Nibiru and the Annunaki again, so I ended up here:

Earlier this month, at a meeting of the American Astronomical Society in Timberline Lodge, Ore., Rodney Gomes, an astronomer from the National Observatory of Brazil in Rio de Janeiro, announced the results of his simulation of a region beyond Pluto known as the "scattered disk," suggesting the presence of an as yet to be discovered massive world.

Well, that got me on a roll, so I decided to check out the dark moon Lilith.

The Dark Moon has also been defined as the apogee of the Moon's orbit, or that point in the orbit farthest from the Earth. Both these points, the apogee and the second focal point, lie on the long axis of the orbital ellipse, the line of apsides. Seen from the Earth, they lie in the same direction, and therefore occupy the same place in the zodiac. The second focal point lies at a distance only about 36´000 km from the Earth, the apogee at about 400´000 km. Apart from this, both definitions can be regarded as being equivalent. Because the orbit of the Moon continually shifts forward in space, the Dark Moon moves along the zodiac at about 40° per year. A complete revolution takes 8 years and 10 months.

And, somehow, that led me here. And I larfed and larfed. For obvious reasons. Because, really, I've known this for 22 years now.

Could there be a monstrous, undiscovered star orbiting our own Sun? Could it be scattering killer comets throughout our Solar System like clockwork every 26 million years? New scientific surveys are probing the edges of our Solar System--a realm populated by giant worlds and mysterious planetoid--hunting for Nemesis, the Sun's purported evil twin. We may be on the verge of discovering this ultimate death star, suspected of causing every mass extinction in Earth's history.
tinhuvielartanis: (Alpaca Lips)
tinhuvielartanis: (Doomsday Clock)
The Waiting Is the Hardest Part

The Mayan Long Count calendar may set a date for the end of the world but provides few details as to what, exactly, will happen. Similarly, the Mayan Long Count cookbook lists all the ingredients for flan but not the technique for setting the edges while still keeping the center wobbly. Doomsday scenarios to expect in 2012 include (but are not limited to):

  • massive geological upheaval

  • collision with a meteor, planet, or black hole

  • magnetic pole shift

  • alien invasion

  • and/or the second coming of Christ.

Essentially, it's a bacon-double doomsday burger. Supersized.

more behind the cut )
tinhuvielartanis: (Lolcat Alpaca Lips)
So here's wisdom from the first 8 days of the Doomsday 2012 calendar.  I'll be posting more ASAP!


What's the deal with 2012?
The doomsday 2012 phenomenon comprises a range of beliefs that some type of cataclysmic or transformative event will occur on December 21, 2012. According to certain interpretations of the Mayan Long Count calendar – an ancient non-repeating calendar that counts the number of days since “creation”- the end of the world falls on this day, which will totally destroy the novelty of writing 12/21/12 on checks. This idea also anchors various other theories and serves as the basis for John Cusack's transition to action hero in Roland Emmerich's 2012, perhaps the worst catastrophe of all, at least to anyone who remembers Say Anything.

Foods Most Likely to Survive Armageddon
If nothing else makes it onto your grocery shopping/pillaging list, make sure you have these stalwart edibles.

  • White rice

  • Bouillon cubes

  • Powdered eggs

  • Powdered milk

  • Those individual packs of crackers and cheese you spread with that little red plastic knife

  • Canned soups (especially Campbell's Chunky, which supposedly eats like a meal; that should make it go a lot further)

One scenario proposed by doomsday theorists is the sudden geomagnetic reversal of the Earth's poles. Make sure you back up all your computer data before this happens, particularly your MP3 library. The afterlife is a long time, and you're going to want those NPR podcasts.

Alternate Endings (Every belief system has its own end-of-days scenario. Which one is right for you?)
NORSE MYTHOLOGY: Translated from Old Norse as “final destiny of the gods,” Ragnarok refers to a series of major events, including a great battle, a set of natural disasters, and the flooding of the Earth. Afterward, the world resurfaces fertile and anew, repopulated by two human survivors and redecorated by IKEA.

Other Doomsday 2012 Prognosticators
Of course, lots of people – not just the ancient Maya – predicted that the world would meet its demise this year, including:

  • Nostradamus, French soothsayer

  • Jose Arguelles and Terence McKenna, New Age philosophers

  • Kalki Bhagavan, guru

  • Whoever's in charge of programming at the History Channel

  • Bashar, an extraterrestrial being who communicates through a human medium named Darryl Anka. That is, whenever Anka isn't busy with his day job as a Hollywood special effects artist for such films as Pirates of the Caribbean and Live Free or Die Hard. (No joke. Check out www.bashar.org and www.imdb.com respectfully.)

Hate the Game, not the Player (get to know the entire cast of characters behind humanity's obliteration – collect 'em all!)
THE WHITE HORSE, AKA “PESTILENCE”: The first of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse described in the Book of Revelation, Pestilence is often referred to as “the cute one.” Some consider him a symbol of evil, others a symbol of righteousness. In this way, Pestilence is Bill Gates, except less nerdy.

Apocalypse by Any other Name...(other terms that can be used to refer to the end of the world)

  • Armageddon

  • Doomsday

  • Judgment Day

  • Ragnarok

  • Gotterdammerung

  • Epic Fail

  • (and Alpaca Lips of course)

tinhuvielartanis: (Alpaca Lips)
This is a horrid sound that is apparently being heard in random places all over the world.

tinhuvielartanis: (Gothxmas)
tinhuvielartanis: (Angry Writer)
My camera didn't get pictures of the hillbilly log roll. Fortunately, Aunt Tudi's 35 MM was able to capture some shots so, as soon as we develop this roll, I'll post the pictures we have. I'm so pissed off, I can't hardly function. Maybe it's Jesus getting his revenge on my lack of respect. Well, fuck that. It only makes me more antagonistic. Poop on them all. Poop, I say, poop!
tinhuvielartanis: (Bible)
Aunt Tudi and I went out to the drug store to get me a stronger anti-biotic before I yanked my left eye out, screaming. When we passed the Duncan First Baptist Church, the parking lot was slam full, and the field across from it was filled to the brim with cars as well. In addition was a huge stack of tree-sized logs, like the ones lumberjacks use to compete with one another on Alaskan lakes. Apparently the xtians at the church are having a big honkin' rapture party, followed by an old-fashioned hillbilly log roll. Yes, I can see it now. Those who don't ascend traditionally, will log roll their way into heaven, to be greeted by a flannel-wearin' Jesus, pulling out his suspenders in pride and joy. If I'd had my camera with me, I would have taken a picture. Praise be.

**EDIT** I'm going back out after my tooth stops hurting so bad just to take pictures of those crazy Rapture-obsessed xtians and their lumberjack logs. I'm doing this for you people because I love you.
tinhuvielartanis: (Bible)
And that's the Fundies have zero, and I do mean ZERO, sense of humour. They all need to get their collective sticks from out of their collective arses because our very existence is proof that the creator has one hell of a sense of humour. How else can we explain our fucked up existence? Get over yourselves, Fundamentalists, or do us all a favour and commit mass suicide so we can laugh at your silly waste of space and get on with our own silly waste of space without having to put up with your utter lack of sanity, self-deprecation, or real belief in god. For the love of Bob...

I am so fucking SICK of living on the buckle of the bible belt!
tinhuvielartanis: (It's Teh Alpaca Lips!)
It's a consensus amongst End Times believers and conspiracy theorists that 12-21-2012 will bring cataclysmic land shifts as the Earth is remade by electromagnetic forces caused by an overdue pole shift. Could what happened in Japan be a small preview of what's to come?

You be the judge...
tinhuvielartanis: (Alpaca Lips)
What's going on today?

  1. I'll be giving Chester his Summertime shaving, and I'll be clipping all the dogs' toenails. At the very least, this will take me a couple of hours. Right now the dogs are all chillaxing like they haven't a care in the world. Once the toenails start flying, they'll know that the day isn't going to be a business-as-usual day of relaxation. I can hear the angry growls of protest now.

  2. Blake is supposed to swing by for a visit so he can pick up his birthday card and gift. Aunt Tudi and I scrimped and saved like crazy in order to give him $20. I'm certain he'll be thrilled with the dough. In this day and age, people are thrilled to get monetary gifts, and they know how fortunate they are to be receiving such a gift. Ten years ago, $20 wasn't that big of a deal. Funny how just a handful of years can make all the difference in the world.

  3. Sometime after the dogs' grooming and family visitation, I'd like to squeeze in some quality time for writing. I haven't sat down to seriously commit some wordage to virtual paper in about a week, and I'm beginning to suffer from the writing withdrawals. Ideally, I'd like to finish "The Last Acolyte" today and begin on the third story in the Cadmus anthology.

  4. Before I begin my work, I'm having a late breakfast and watching 2012. That movie is like porn for me as I see global mass destruction on an unprecedented scale, and hope that this actually happens next year. The more I watch this movie, the more I get the warm fuzzlies. The only thing I hope does not happen is that anyone survives the cataclysm. Only the animals should survive the 2012 disaster. After all the horror our species has imposed upon planet Earth and our fellow inhabitants, Humanity deserves extinction.

  5. After my work, I need to do some online research on Ramtha for Todd. I've known about this grifter for decades, and Todd and I have discussed her in the past. He was invited to a dinner party last weekend where the folks discussed a variety of spiritual matters. A few days later, he asked his friend to what group they all belonged because I had asked Todd and Todd didn't know. His friend told him that they belonged to Ramtha's School of Enlightenment. My knee jerk reaction was "Ohhh nooo..." I've already sent some information about JZ Knight/Ramtha to Todd, but I need to send him more. The aim is to ensure Todd does not associate with these people at any depth because RSE is a cult and a dangerous one at that.

So this will take up the majority of my Bealtainne. One more Bealtainne to be had before the Alpaca Lips. I may have to find me a gawgeous man with whom to celebrate my last Bealtainne... If only Vin Diesel would volunteer for God to my Goddess duties, I could leave this mortal coil a happy happy woman. Heh.


Sep. 27th, 2010 02:14 pm
tinhuvielartanis: (Alpaca Lips)
I checked and I have fewer than 40 entries to make it to entry number 9000. That's 9000 posts in probably just over 8 years. I either have a lot to say or I've been wasting an incredible amount of time. My posts have gotten fewer and farther between compared to a few years ago, so I wonder if I can make the big 10,000 before 12 December, 2012. What would be cool is if I could make my 10,000th post on the Alpaca Lips. I may have to fix it that way in some way. I still average around 1000 posts a year, so we'll see.
tinhuvielartanis: (Alpaca Lips)
[livejournal.com profile] booraven22 asked: The Hobbit is coming out in 2013...do you now hope the Alpaca Lips does not occur?
Now see, I'm torn here. I really really REALLY want to see The Hobbit, especially if James McAvoy plays Bilbo. But I also really really REALLY want all this bullshit to end. So I'm hoping that, whatever transpires on 12-21-2012, I'll still get to see the movie in the Otherworld and even hobnob with the filmmakers.

[livejournal.com profile] stacye13 asked: recent weather disasters being a precursor to the alpaca lips?
Absolutely. My theory is that the planet will change poles in 2012. The Mayans had nailed this natural phenomenon before and I believe that their calendar marks the general time at which the pole shift shall occur. Then all sorts of shit will happen. Will we as a species survive? I hope not, but we've survived it before, so who knows?
tinhuvielartanis: (Snow)
First off, a big THANKEE to [livejournal.com profile] brujah for the bear hug. You can see it on my profile page. I could use all the bear hugs I can muster right now. I'm a raw nerve ending as I wait to hear the verdict on The Chalice. If the response is a positive one, I will consider myself incredibly lucky, having so many talented and capable people come to my aid at precisely the perfect time. And some say there's no such thing as divine intervention. If everything works out to my satisfaction, I most assuredly won't squander the good will and kindness of those who've offered me a hand. Having been on the other end of that sorry situation, I will never knowingly or willingly throw that kind of grief on another person.

We finally got snow. Not ice, not freezing rain or sleet, but full-blown, fluffy, lovely snow. There is nothing more peaceful or sacred than the sound of snow falling upon itself at night. It's like the Earth is whispering herself to sleep. Of course, Duncan receiving so much snow in such a short period of time (I see a good 7 inches in my yard) is surely a sign of the Alpaca Lips. The End Is Coming and it looks like this.

I may go out later on and build a snow thing. It may not be a man or a woman, thus the thing cognomen. If I do, of course, pictures shall be taken.

In the meantime, I need to get with Editor Supreme [livejournal.com profile] gunslingaaahhh and have more of the 3rd draft Chalice sent to me to do a final read through just in the event Sophie wants more. It's never a bad thing to be a bit ahead of the game. ::nods::

Happy Snowpocalypse!
tinhuvielartanis: (Default)
On Thursday, Aunt Tudi and I had the fortune of meeting up with [livejournal.com profile] falkenna, [livejournal.com profile] janalyson, [livejournal.com profile] paulpearson23, and Jan's daughter Jennifer. We met up at the Espresso Cafe for coffee. Everyone had some sort of coffee except for Tallis (she had Chai) and me (I had root beer ~ no caffeine). Tallis and Paul were in from England and her sister Jan and Jennifer were driving them about for various holiday festivities. This was the first time Tallis had been back in the States for Christmas in 25 years, so it was a particularly monumental time for her. They're here through the first week of the new year I do believe.

We talked about all sorts of things: England, SC, NC, naked mole rats, The Joker Blogs, centipedes, millipedes, medications, The Blood Crown, Barry Andrews (I bet his hears were burning off!), young Finn, and Aunt Tudi read her poetry...which gave the place a real coffee house vibe. And Tallis and Paul gave me a gift. Paul named him and I had to draw lips on him to make him the new mascot for the First Church of the Alpaca Lips. Behold Barack Ollama, the mascot for the Alpaca Lips!


We yapped, yammered, and chattered until one of the coffee house staff came up and told us they were closing and we had to leave, so we were essentially kicked out. Ha! But we got in about three good hours of fellowship and bonding so that's really cool. It was great to see them all again and it made me really homesick for England. I had to watch Mr. Brooks, even though I have the song on iTunes, so I could hear young Finn at the end of the movie. Even though I've never met him, I feel like I know the kid. When...not if...when I go back to England (for good), I'll meet him, and I'll hang out with Tallis and Paul more often than than a few hours every three or four years.
tinhuvielartanis: (Alpaca Lips)
tinhuvielartanis: (It's Teh Alpaca Lips!)
Prepare yourselves, people! This is only the beginning of sorry and strife before 2012! Thank you, [livejournal.com profile] filmkitty!

Farmer bitten by beast in first ever British alpaca attack

::dons tinfoil hat::

x-posted to [livejournal.com profile] alpaca_lips

Here I Be

Jun. 13th, 2009 09:02 am
tinhuvielartanis: (It's Teh Alpaca Lips!)
I'm up early after a very late night. Slept well and feel okay. I had my sights set on some Lady Grey tea, but we don't have any. We did have some Earl Grey, so I'm drinking that instead. I could use the caffeine. So now I"m wondering what I should do first. Should I write more on The Blood Crown or tackle the review for "Nowhere Nothing Ever?"

I woke up in a musical mood. I've been thinking of brushing up on the ole singing box 'cos I'm beyond rusty. I'll start with the ones I'm know and can sing well, then I'm thinking of stretching out to try to strengthen my voice. I'm already a good foot away from a microphone, but I want to get further back, if possible. I want to be able to sing in an acoustic environment without a microphone, just let my voice bounce off wooden walls. If a capella is instrument-free, I think it should be technologically free period. It adds to the performance.

What I really want to do is crawl back into bed, but I know that, if I do that, I won't sleep at all tonight. So I stay up and tend to the tasks at hand.

Oh, I watched Life After People last night. Experts predicted that camels in Las Vegas zoos would escape and go feral, evolving into a smaller, swifter animal of the Western Desert, not unlike a Guanaco. When I heard that, I died laughing. Life After People is all about the End Times and here they are predicting that a cousin of the Alpaca will pretty much take over Las Vegas. Alpaca Lips indeed! So, when the Guanacos and Randall Flagg show up in Vegas, you'll know your ass has had it.

Two hours

Jun. 11th, 2009 11:41 am
tinhuvielartanis: (It's Teh Alpaca Lips!)
I've had two hours sleep and I'm raring to go! That's sarcasm. Why is it always two hours? I really want to know. Is there some unwritten cosmic law that I only get to sleep in jags of two hours? Who wrote the law? I want hunt them down and kick their asses. I just looked in the mirror and my eyes are red-rimmed and puffy. I look like the second pig in this video.

The Stoner Pig look just doesn't do it for me.

In other news, check the icon [livejournal.com profile] xevokitty made for me. I love it when folks get involved with the holy message of the Alpaca Lips! And that camelid is just funny as all Sith Hell. It needs a serious makeover. Then again, so do I. That and some sleep.


May. 27th, 2009 11:44 pm
tinhuvielartanis: (I Blog)
Although I don't use it in the manner most do, I do have a Twitter account. The main thing I use it for, is for a countdown to the Alpaca Lips. Join me, won't you?


tinhuvielartanis: (Default)
The Cliffs of Insanity

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